I told her I just couldn’t seem to keep my apartment in order, which resulted in living in a mess all the time. I related feebly that I had turned the problem over to my Higher Power, and I had been praying to have God clean my home. Of course I had been mistaken then about the role of my Higher Power in my recovery….
My sponsor and I had a good laugh about my first two attempts to deal with my messy apartment and how these ideas typically visit most of us in recovery as we make progress in understanding how the Steps work in our lives. I now know that if I don’t want to live in a mess, I need to pray to God for the willingness, courage, and motivation to clean up my own mess.~ P., Bill; W., Todd; S., Sara. Drop the Rock: Removing Character Defects – Steps Six and Seven (pp. 31-32). Hazelden Publishing. Kindle Edition.
We are too easily overwhelmed when we set our sights only on the accomplished goal. We need to focus, instead, on the individual elements and then on just one element at a time. A book is written, word by word. A house is built, timber by timber. ~ Casey, Karen. Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women. Hazelden Publishing. Kindle Edition.
After working with a wise woman today
this passage yelled for my response.
Me: What makes me feel bad, mind, body and spirit?
Mind – sitting here this long procrastinating. Looking at the clutter everywhere.
Body – walking, especially stairs, standing from sitting or lying for a while. That raw place on the heel.
Spirit – feeling hopeless that things won’t change.
WW: One piece at a time.
And I sit here this evening
not not half through with the reading!
Sure, I can put in place one item, but…
The readings are finished, I’ve written an email
to get some things out of the house
and made a little progress on an eyesore
I walk past twenty times a day.
I listened too two Wise Women
including, ” We need to focus, instead,
on the individual elements
and then on just one element at a time.”
I’ve made a note to get an unbroken container,
and I have prayed
for the willingness, courage,
to clean up my own mess.