What in my life is bothering me
today that I don’t want to face?
Age. I assumed I’d live long since my
patents and grandparents did.
But there’s nobody older than me
within the third degree of con sanguinity
since my sister died when she had lived
two-hundred two days longer than I’ve lived now.
Suddenly I’m old, have a handicap license,
walk with a cane at times
and my to-do list needs completion.
I learn I have good cause to be fatigued.
And even that feels embarrassing.
I’ve been dieting since I was thirteen,
in recovery nearly ten years, never
reaching or maintaining a healthy body weight.
So, what does recovery say now?
Yesterday’s past, tomorrow’s out of reach.
Today’s my present, allI I’ve got.
I have no need to do what I can’t,
need only surrender and allow myself to be used.